How to stay motivated & committed to your self-care practice
Amanda StansfieldFirst I want to start this post by saying you are doing absolutely incredible work. The energy and love you are providing to another human being is recognized, appreciated and valued more than you know. Breathe in this gratitude and remind yourself during the times of hardship you are loved, appreciated and valued too! You my beautiful friend are like no other. Remind yourself from time to time how valuable your unique gift is with an offering of self-love! You are worth it!
When you’re a caregiver it is easy to overwork yourself, overlook your self-care practice and put your own personal needs aside. Caregiver stress, fatigue, overwhelm and overall burnout can easily be dismissed when caring for your loved ones.
When I say caregiver you don’t have to be caring for an aging relative or disabled loved one. A caregiver is anyone who cares for another. Are you a parent? Spouse? Son or daughter? Teacher? Perhaps you are responsible for another human in the workplace? If so, you are indeed a caregiver. And caregiving has the potential to be all-consuming. But it shouldn’t be so at the expense of your own health and happiness. There are solutions to be successful at managing your responsibilities to yourself as well as to the person you care for.
Sometimes we talk ourselves into believing we are the only one capable of… Often, asking for help, or time for yourself makes you feel weak, or not living up to your caregiving role. I’m hear to tell you this is not true. It’s quite the opposite. On the outside you may come across as capable, strong and the superwoman that you are, so much so that no-one knows you are crumbling on the inside and in desperate need of support. If you don’t invite help and time into your life it will never show up.
That was me. I thought I had to wake up at 5am just to get a work out in, volunteer at my daughters school on my days off, work 18 hours a day, cook nourishing dinners every single night, be the go to confidant for all my friends, be a do it all single mom on top of taking care of my special needs daughter. Phew, just writing that down brings up memories of overwhelm and chronic fatigue.
As a caregiver you deserve as much love and joy as the person you care for. If you hear yourself complaining there isn’t enough time in the day for your own needs you will (if you haven’t yet) start to begrudge the role you are in. This is when fatigue, depression, anxiety and overwhelm become your daily state of mind. Trust me, prioritizing your own self-care practice is critical for your work-life balance, health and happiness, but also for the person you care for.
Below I share a simple exercise to help you brainstorm ideas to stay motivated & committed to your self-care.
Write a self-care checklist
In an ideal world with no limitations, what does your ideal life look like? What does your daily routine look like? How about your self-care routine and rituals? Now prioritize this ideal scenario with what is most important to you. Remember in order to be the very best caregiver you have to reserve time and resources to take care of YOU first… not just today or this week but on an ongoing basis.
Take the time to list the things you need and want to do for yourself-again you are manifesting exactly what your ideal life looks like. Below I provide examples of my must have’s, but make your list in whatever way makes most sense to you.
Physical Health
- Exercise daily (can be as simple as 5 minutes)
- Meditate daily (as short as 5 minutes)
- Eat nourishing foods and stay hydrated
- Get out into nature daily (a quick walk around the block)
- Get a massage every month (acupuncture)
Emotional Health
- Call a friend or family member every week for a chat
- Talk with a therapist, spiritual advisor, confidant weekly
- Carve out time for personal spiritual practice
- Read/journal
- Meditate
Personal Growth
- Develop a hobby or passion project
- Journal, use this as a tool to really listen to the true version of yourself, get to know the real you
- Develop clear boundaries with people and close the door on unhealthy relationships
- Set clear expectations of others, practice crystal clear communication
- Declutter your life/home (start with a drawer)
Now think how you can integrate one ritual from each category into your life. Start small and slow, and notice how this simple ritual can radically transform your emotional wellbeing. If you need more ideas, be sure to download my FREE 30 days of self-love rituals.
Remember the words I started this post with… you are deeply appreciated, recognized and valued, now please give yourself the same amount of love and time as you do for others. You are worth it!